AUDIO: My Birthday Preface, From: "I'm not mad anymore"

My Birthday Preface

Today I turn 71. Yippee!

Today I turn over to my family and friends, a series of short stories in print, audio, and video called “I’m not mad anymore”, published on the first and 15thof every month.

You can hear the audio, view the videos, and read the transcript on Youtube, Spotify, Apple, Substack and on my website, cindilamb.com

Just google my name “Cindi Lamb” and it will come up! Man, I’m feeling important. 

The stories are presented in three time frames:
Before the hickey, 1955 through 1966 (age 1 through 11)

After the hickey, 1967 through 1979 (age 12 through 24) 

After the crash, 1979, to 2026 (age 24 through age 71, and hopefully, beyond!)

A good preface answers two important questions:

Why do it?

And

Whozit for?

Why do it now? Here’s my shortlist:

#1: I’m running out of time! Holy moly, I’m 71 today! It’s freakin me out!

#2: I finally feel confident enough in my storytelling skills to bring these stories to light. I was never much of a reader because I couldn’t sit still long enough, and because if a story doesn’t hook me within five minutes, I’m outta here. These are damn good true stories that are uplifting, tragic, hilarious, and incongruous. But they were all written to hook you, posthaste. 

And #3:

I’m doing this now because I’ve run out of excuses to cover my fear of publishing, like, “I’ll publish my stories as soon as I: 

o finish teaching this semester.”

o go back to Celoron for more research.”

o Go fishing in Canada one more year

o Rewrite it and re-record it one more time

o stop swearing so much.”

o stop drinking so much.”

o lose weight.”

Oh man, I got a million of them!

Lots of folks have asked me to write these stories, and I said I would, when the time was right, when I was skilled enough to tell it; when I felt brave enough to relive it. When I grew a pair, again. 

I did.

Who are these stories for:

When I write, I see the faces of people I know in my head, like all my Bush family in Wattsburg and Clymer, I see my old boyfriends (packed in an auditorium, HA!), and people dancing at the Lakewood Rod and Gun and Mallare’s Picnic, and I see the scowling faces of all the little girls who didn’t win Little Miss Chautauqua County Princess in 1963, because I WON! and my Dad pouring gas on the Hut behind Jamesway. I originally thought my stories were just for the faces of the people I know.

But they’re not. These stories are for anyone who has a face (sorry worms).

Here’s a little about me:

I grew up as Cindi Bush in Celoron, New York, about an hour south of Buffalo. We lived at the end of Livingston Avenue, right on Chautauqua Lake! What a total blast. 

My Mom and Dad shared a passionate love affair for 47 years, no kidding.

My Dad, Harold “Popcorn” Bush, was a plastering contractor, a ceramic tile artisan, a talented wine maker, a fastidious gardener, and a respected moose and deer hunter and fisherman in western New York and parts of Ontario, Canada. 

My Mom, Millee Bush, was the best-dressed woman in Jamestown. No kidding, just ask anyone! She grew up in New York City and worked for James Cash Penny himself! My Mom was endeared to thousands of children as Mrs. Santa Claus for over 30 years, made a lush, comforting home, and was the funniest, kindest, most loving, beautiful, and supportive person I’ve ever known. 

My brother Steve Bush was a Rough Rider with a tender heart, which he brutally guarded for most of his life. He was extremely loyal to his friends. I adored and idolized him when I was growing up, and so did my daughter Jennifer, my son Alan, and especially my daughter Laura. Steve was my OG diversion.

Currently, I live in the middle of eight heavenly acres in a big red barn in Conowingo, Maryland, I’ve been married for sixteen fantastic years to Gordon Wiley, who is an unbelievably loving and caring gift of a human being, and my third husband (or as he says, “I’m her current husband!). AND, right now, I’m living the second-best time of my life! 

(FYI, my first best time: swimming in the lake at the end of our dock and playing kickball at the Celoron Playground, what a boondoggle blast!) 

We have five children, four grandchildren, chickens, dogs, fish, a nice camper, and LOTS of fun family parties and bonfires here at the barn.

I have a Master’s degree in Health Science Education, and this is my 42nd year teaching college health science classes, specializing in compassionate sexuality courses. I currently teach at Towson University in Baltimore and at Harford Community College near Bel Air, MD. I LOVE my job! And I still LOVE my students!

My hobbies: sewing, singing, writing, gardening, camping, hanging with my family and driving the tractor. And bonfires. 

Healthwise, I was diagnosed with severe rheumatoid disease ten years ago, which is the bane of my existence. I f-king hate it. I’ve had five surgeries so far. I’ve always been overweight, but I’ve lost 41 pounds as of today using Wegovy. I plan on using Wegovy until I lose enough weight to drop through my butt hole. 

And I’m NOT mad anymore, for the most part, for most of the time. But there are still times when that self-strangling, flaming hatred for that mother f-ker roars up like a fire in a tire factory, especially now, remembering it all, writing about it all, and reliving it again. 

There is saucy sex and spiritual seeking and joyful buffoonery and plenty of passion here, because that’s how I CHOOSE to divert my attention and live my life.

But cold beer, pricey vodka, and joyfully singing to the Holy Spirit are also very helpful.

I am truly grateful for your time,

Cindi